Friday, December 19, 2008

The Gospel According to BOOYAH - Day I, part I

Freshman 15 Tour: 12 Men, one destination, endless good times.

The story begins in the freshly acquired apartment of Rocktapus, where post-finals/pre-tour festivities were taking place. The evening began with Smokee, Rocktapus, Karate Kid, Gameboy, Slutkin B and myself enjoying some pizza and good company. People drifted in and out, and while we lost a few friends early on, we gained Tornado, Land O' Lakes, Rocktapus' fun roommates, a couple amazing APhi's, and couple lovely PHaze ladies. I would say the first major event of the night was when we began playing "Loaded Questions: Adult Version". As the erotic creativity of college students began to flow (providing many lines inappropriate for a family audience), so did the beverages. Yours truly left the party around 12:30 to go pack, but I heard the party raged on for at least a few more hours. This was foreshadowing.

After packing took an unnecessarily long time, BOOYAH got to sleep around 2:30, with an alarm set for 4:45 to meet Tornado. Fantastic. Two hours of laying in bed with my eyes closed passed a lot quicker than it should have, and I got up to meet Tornado for coffee before almost all businesses are open to sell it to us. Tornado failed to meet me outside his dorm, and also failed to answer any pestering phone calls I attempted. This was foreshadowing of the darkest kind.

Karate Kid, Bubbles and I loaded up Bubbles' car around 5:20, ten minutes before the set meeting time for F15 in the MAB parking lot. We picked up Gameboy and met F15 at more like 5:45. Departure time was 6:00 a.m. Timing was good, right? Are the men of Freshman 15 really this responsible and coordinated? Of course not. Where was Tornado and Rocktapus?

Oh no.

Neither were answering their phones, and both lived in buildings that none of us could access. 6:00 a.m. rolls around and we split up in desperation. Some helpful strangers got us into Tornado's dorm and up to his room where we found him unpacked and in a completely inadequate state for loud noises and quick thinking. Rocktapus was still missing. We called his roommates, his friends, and we would've called his landlord if we had the number. Thanks to the lovely Ms. Green and Ms. Hotopp, Rocktapus got up and got moving at 6:20. We had a show at Miami University in Ohio at 1:00 p.m. So if we leave at 6:30, we'll get there at 11:30. Plenty of time right? Oh wait, there's a time change. Actually, it'll be 12:30. That gives us a half hour before that show, and that's an ideal situation.

The Alpha car departs in hopes that Rocktapus gets up and out within the next 10 minutes. They leave by 7:00. An hour after the ETD, all three cars have left for Oxford, Ohio. It doesn't take long (about 20 minutes before the first car gets lost in downtown Chicago, thanks to a last minute lane change by the alpha car.

The Alpha car included Gameboy (tour Music Director), BOOYAH (Tour Manager), Karate Kid (Tour AMD and Pitch Master), and Bubbles (Business Manager) behind the wheel, and our drive was most likely the easiest. With a stop at a quaint little midwestern place called Wendy's, somehow the Alpha Car arrived at Miami University with 25 Minutes to spare before the concert. Word was that the other two cars were about 20 minutes out. We were gonna make it.

Or WERE we?

A call from Tornado comes in with 15 minutes till showtime, and the conversation goes like this:

Tornado: "Uhhhh, our car's in a ditch"
BOOYAH: "STFU where are you? When will you be here?"
Tornado: "We think the axle's broken. One wheel won't turn"

Gameboy: "I guess we'll do a show with four people..."

BOOYAH:  :-(

This would be a good time to mention that as tour manager, this entire portion of the trip has been EXTREMELY STRESSFUL. BOOYAH was very worried about the safety of F15, and about getting everyone to the first show of the tour on time so we could impress the fabled beauties of the Misfitz. By some pure miracle, Snapz' car was not broken, and with the help of a few rando good samaritans, they got the car out of the ditch and back on the road. The entire group showed up about 4 minutes after the show had started, with the Misfitz singing the beginning of their set (which included a HOT a cappella cover of 'Used to Love U' by John Legend. *cough* *coughTOLDYOUSOcough*). 

In true F15 fashion, the group ran in to the gig before running on stage and doing a solid set for a small college crowd. After we finished, the girls blew us away, and not the other way around. Jokes aside, the Misfitz were the best female a cappella group I have heard to date. Their arrangements were complex and interesting, their blend was perfect, their soloists rivaled any pop star out there, and their beatboxing was hot. On top of all of that, they are all beautiful. The misfitz are tits!

In retrospect, the beginning of tour was a necessary and fun part of the many memories made. Everything worked out by the time the gig started, and the rest of the tour went 98% smoothly. As this is the first official tour for Freshman 15, we learned many valuable lessons for future tours in these few hours before our first gig:
1) Pre-Tour festivities are a bad idea. 
Addendum: If pre-tour festivities must take place, make sure sleeping is not part of the plan.
2) Make departure time at least 2 hours before actual necessary departure time
3) On tour, always try and perform with talented, attractive ladies.



Thus concludes Part I of Day I of The Gospel According to BOOYAH

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